You know those songs you share with someone and you can’t quire recall why the song became so significant but it did? “I’ll Always Come Back” by KT Oslin is one of the songs I share with my mom (along with “Ruff Ryders Anthem” by DMX and “No Peace, Los Angeles” by Mike Doughty – she’s a complex woman, lol ). No matter how far outside of the lines I color or where I travel to I always come back to her.
My mom is my favorite person in the whole world. If you know her, she’s rolling her eyes right now while reading this. 😉 When I was in 7th grade I made a new friend and when she came over for the first time she went on and ON about how amazing her parents were. When she left my mom took me aside and said “If you ever talk about your dad and I like that I will kill you”. LOL. That’s how she is – 100% no bullshit. But, fiercely loyal and the most amazing mother (and best friend) a girl could ask for.
She didn’t have the easiest childhood and when she married my dad she wasn’t even sure she wanted kids. Oh wait, let me tell you about my parents for a quick sec. You see, they met when my dad was working a side job for my mom’s brother. On their first date my dad made a comment about how he wasn’t the marrying kind. My mom responded with “What makes you think you’re so fucking special I’d want to marry you anyways?!”. Sass. So much sass. They got engaged 3 months later and have been married for 40 years. Crazy eh? So 40 years of marriage, a nice house in the suburbs and 2 kids later, being a mom has become her identity.
So, from humble beginnings emerges this 5’1″ Sicilian spitfire who straight does not give a fuck what you think (Mom is an OG). She can talk to anyone, she’ll call you out on your bullshit, she has a LONG memory and she is sometimes the child in our relationship (which means some times I need to be the adult). But she’s also EVERYONE’s mom (friends from all walks of life, co-workers, people every, single place we patronize call her Mom. Our shared identify is Mom & Sam.). She is extremely quotable and I thought it was time I honored some of my Mom lessons in a post of their own.
- You’ll never be this age again – enjoy it. In high school she used to say this to me every time I wanted to rush life and be grown up and in college. In college she would remind me of this when I worked 50 hrs a week instead of having fun with my friends because I liked having my own money. I was always rushing to grow up and she was always pushing me to slow down. Enjoy where you are right now because you won’t get to be back here ever again. One night a few months ago I got home from a terrible date and needed a good mom cry. She reminded me that some day I will be coming home to my amazing future husband and I’ll look back on these dates and laugh at the losers I went out with. When I get sad that I haven’t started my own family she reminds me that I’m so lucky I can work from home doing a job I love and spend my nights at Studio Poise – life with a husband and kids doesn’t leave a lot of wiggle room for a Tuesday triple. 🙂
- Water finds its own level. Anytime I have been upset someone I’ve invested my time in doesn’t turn out to be the person I thought she will remind me that water always finds its own level and he (whomever he may be) just wasn’t 0n my wavelength so he couldn’t stay in my life. She hasn’t been wrong yet. 😉
- God puts you where you’re supposed to be. In 2009 I quit my job and tried to relocate to LA. It didn’t work out and while I was devastated, my mom was more devastated by the idea of her eldest being 3,000 miles away. However, she kept telling me the timing wasn’t right and God was redirecting me to something better. It’s taken a long while for me to see it – but I AM exactly where I am supposed to be. Sometimes not getting what you want can be the most amazing twist of fate.
- Just because everyone else is doing it doesn’t mean it’s right for you. My mom always encouraged my uniqueness. I had pink hair in high school (though she did ground me for this!) and made my own bell bottoms and pretended not to give a fuck what people thought (though I totally did because I was 17 after all). I pursued a major that made me happy and as an adult I’ve always taken the longer road (because the view is prettier) rather than take the shortcut everyone else was on. In those moments where I struggle because my version of happiness isn’t what everyone around me seems to want she’s reminded me that being true to myself is always #1.
- Last but not least, you can’t turn a hoe into a housewife. No explanation needed, this is by FAR her funniest and most quoted life lessons. 😉 Anytime I’ve been dumped for some basic bitch she will remind me of this quote and we’ll both giggle.
Thank you Mom for the life lessons, the laughs and for always having my back. XO ❤